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Monday, September 8, 2014

Seeking a Sponsor

This is about marriage. No, maybe more about divorce.

I hate divorce. Hate it and everything it stands for, no, against. Now hear me, because I'm not saying I hate people who are divorced or will be divorced.  As a mentor of mine always said, "Grace to you."...the same Grace that is to me. But divorce in itself, I hate.

Divorce is not patient, divorce is not kind. Divorce involves envy, it's boastful and proud. It dishonors many and is self-seeking. It's filled with anger, keeping a thorough record of wrongs.  Divorce delights in evil and disregards the truth. It never protects, never trusts, never hopes, and most certainly does not persevere. 



If that sounds familiar, it's because it's the opposite of what you hear at almost every wedding. The antonym of 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. What love is not, divorce is. 

Pretty disturbingly to me, I've had multiple people, in just the last couple months, well-meaningfully say, "If Doug (my husband) were ever to start drinking again, I'd support you leaving him."

How disappointing. Support my leaving him? What about support my loving him? Who will help me love him if Lord forbid my beloved ever did fall back into addiction, darkness, despair? Who will pray with me for him, encourage him with me, and serve him with love in his ultimate "for worse"? Who will support me in that?

Because if you support my leaving him when he stumbles, then the enemy not only has a hold on him, but our marriage also. You'd be supporting the enemy, not me, not him, definitely not our marriage. And what if I were the one doing the stumbling? What then?

I need someone to hold our marriage accountable, no matter what comes our way. To remind us of 1 Corinthians 13 love. To shove our own vows in our face, our vows of forgiveness and prayerfulness. Someone who doesn't accept the lie of put the "me" before the "us". (Because that's not what I signed up for, that's not what I agreed to.) I made a deal, a promise, a covenant, and I need some back-up, a witness in that, to call me out, without fear of offense. I need a sponsor. That's who I need and that's what our marriage needs. And I'm hopeful you're already out there.

Don't just sit through weddings, post some pictures, and wish em well.
Sponsor a marriage.

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