Mouse in the House

One of the unconsidered joys of living in an old farmhouse surrounded by horses and fields is the occasional mouse that comes wandering in looking for shelter. I guess I figured they were probably around, but lately it’s become more than obvious (i.e. -  when one stops right in front of me and stares for a while).

 A few months back, when I saw the first gray blur scurry past me one night, I screamed so loud that I woke the kids, and Baileigh came running downstairs. I was standing on top of the dining room table, so she just joined me. Doug was out coaching that night, and we actually stood and even slept on the wooden table for almost 3 hours until he got back. After that incident I hadn’t physically seen one in a while, but just the other week, Doug and I rented a movie, sat down to relax after the kiddos were down,  and this then little guy ran out in front of us then ran away then came back again. I stood on top of the couch hysterically crying, covering my eyes, yelling at Doug to just tell me when it was over. (We ended up waking up the kids and sleeping at Mima’s that night because Mommy was unstable.)

So needless to say, this has always been a horrible phobia of mine. It might have slightly settled down a bit once I became more acquainted with these guys. But if being 8-months pregnant isn’t enough to keep you awake at night, a chilling scritch-scratch sound behind the old walls will certainly do the job. I’m exhausted. After trying every humane, home-remedy (traps, oils, buzzing machines), we finally taped up the gaping farmhouse holes and got an exterminator. So I’d say the problem is finally under control, or at least we’re on the winning side at this point in the game. Plus, literally facing this fear of mine has toughened me up quite a bit.

Of course, even mice issues bring me back to God though. At some point, I realized there wasn’t much my husband could do to protect me. I had spent at least 100 bucks on “best-selling solutions”.  And the exterminator, while a relief, said after his 10-minute treatment  to “give it a week or so.” So who was going to help me? I wasn’t sleeping. I was completely paranoid, even out in public. And my day-to-day essentials, like going to the bathroom or cleaning around the house, were becoming an exhausting mental battle.

So I got down with some raw, impromptu prayer - no fancy words, not on my knees, not even with my eyes closed (they haven’t been closed in weeks, this was no exception, too vulnerable).  Think wide-eyed, slightly psycho-sounding mumblings instead.

·         “Jesus, protect me, protect me. Give me protection.”

·         “Give me peace of mind, Lord. Calm me down. I’m freaking out!”

·         “Help me function. I’m running on nothing. Please, God! Please, please, please.”

And while they may just be mouse-in-the-house type prayers, they were some of the realest prayers I’ve prayed in a while because I was so desperate! I’ve personally seen time and again that out of desperation, God delivers. I’d also say it’s a humbling state to be shaking over something furry and smaller than my fist. Humbled and Desperate makes for good prayer!

 I realized too that everything I was praying for at 4 a.m. was Bible-backed, God-guaranteed.

·         Protection

·         Peace

·         Strength

…some of the main promises of God.  And when I cry out to Him for these things, in desperation and with expectation, I  know I’ll be heard and answered. Thank goodness. I just don’t know why I far too often go to Him as my last resort. After I tell the hubby, after I browse the internet, after call the professional, then I think, oh hey, did I even take this to God yet? He needs to be my number one emergency contact, regardless of the emergency. God cares about something as small as a mouse in the middle of the night because it’s big to me and I am His child.

“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

~ 1 Peter 5:7

Fear Not

"Fear not."  It's probably the most common phrase in the Bible, usually coming from God himself or from one of His angels, and yet fear is probably the most common issue we face day-to-day.

Fear of not making enough money. Fear of the future or the unknown. Fear of pain. Fear of losing someone. Fear of pretty much everything.

Obviously, judging by the amount of times He tells us to "fear not", God doesn't want us living like this. We'll miss all He has for us when we live life cornered by fear. I think God also recognizes how much we tend to default to fear, or He wouldn't feel the need to repeat Himself, but He wants us to default to Him instead.

Around Christmas time, Baileigh memorized what the angels said to the shepherds when Jesus was born. And now at Easter, she learned what the angels said to the women at the tomb. She's gotten them a little mixed up at times because they both begin with the same "Don't be afraid." So she's come up with a blending of the two holidays,but it still works.. "Don't be afraid. I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people. Jesus, who was crucified, isn't here!"

Amen! The first words of each original holiday begin with "don't be afraid" (or "fear not"). I know it's obviously because an angel has just appeared out of nowhere to them and I'm sure they were shaking in their boots. But also, with both announcements, Jesus being born and risen, it's assuring them (and us) "you don't need to live in fear anymore- and this is why."

Research shows that the emotion of fear "triggers more than 1,400 known physical and chemical responses, and activates more than 30 different hormones and neurotransmitters" (Dr. Caroline Leaf). Fear is also the root emotion behind all stress, and stress can actually marinate our bodies in toxic chemicals. Clearly, fear is even dangerous to our health. So where does this powerful, unhealthy, negative emotion of fear come from? Well I know where it does not come from..

The Bible says, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." ~2 Timothy 1:7

This verse has been playing in my head for weeks now - when I feel the fear start creeping in, I am training myself to say, "Nope, God has not created me with a spirit of fear." And then replace the fear with thoughts of power, love, and calmness. All things that God's Word and His presence are overflowing with. But fear, that is never from Him. He desires that we don't live in fear, but in Him. And only in Him do we have the power to deny fear and replace it. Even if it's every second of everyday at first.

"Fear not." It's in God's Word many, many times. But even if He only said it once, it would still be enough for me.