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Monday, May 19, 2014

Jealous

I don't have much time... I'm sitting here typing one-handed with a baby on my lap and bottle in the other hand. I got two other munchkins riding anything with wheels down the front walkway with a side-smirk showing through because they know it's past bedtime. But I wanted to get this down, if just for myself, before my head hits the pillow seeming to erase the day's wisdom, etch-a-sketch style, gone.

I spent a good amount of time this morning replenishing a tree I've been turning into the local gathering place for the neighborhood birds. The tree tavern serves cardinals, jays, finches, woodpeckers, and hummingbirds... it certainly brings out the dork in me. But colorful visitors, especially while washing dishes (again) or during a particularly quiet naptime, brings variety and company right to my window.
I had restocked four feeders and added some fresh water; there was already a ton of activity and a hummingbird darting around me in anticipation with the nectar still in my hand.
But later, while my littlest ones were asleep, and I had a moment to stare and enjoy, there was nothing. Not one bird. And I was given a thought, a complete, uninterrupted thought:

If they know there is constant nourishment here, why would they even bother looking anywhere else? 

Oh, I actually said aloud.
Wow, is that me God? I do that too?
You too are constant. You are sustaining. You are abundant. You are never-ending. And yet I still look elsewhere sometimes. What else is out there? Is there something better, more convenient, tastier?
I've tasted and I've seen, so why ever leave, if even for a second, that Good, Life-giving Source.

"Then Jesus declared, 'I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.'" ~John 6:35

In that moment, I actually found myself jealous for these birds I've come to know, come back, come back, where did you go? I'm right here and ready to constantly feed you, fill you, enjoy you... but where are you?

"Do not worship any other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God." ~ Exodus 34:14


Oh.

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