Waiting

So my family went away on a two-part, 14 day vacation while I was 37 weeks pregnant. I had it in my head for months, that as long as the baby and I can just hang in there until we got home from our trip, then everything would be fine and his arrival would be just around the corner. Well this "corner" is turning out to be a lot longer than it was in my head. I remember feeling this way with my daughter too, certain that another day just couldn't possibly go by without her coming... but it did, again and again.

I'm due in just a few days and last week the doctor told me I was starting to dilate. Finally.. some encouraging news, but of course it added to my anxiousness. I can't stop obsessing over it; I went for walks, swims, did squats til my thighs ached, tried some acupressure, and ate spicy food for two days straight. I had some contractions and a few signs that things were moving along, but no baby! I was frustrated... but at who? Myself? My baby? God?? Then, after a random storm led me and my daughter to Chik-fil-a instead of the pool,  I had a mini-revelation. While eating my  Classic Spicy Chicken Sandwich, a Christian song came on with these simple words... "while I'm waiting, I will praise You, while I'm waiting".

How many times, Lord, have I made the choice to praise you in the midst of waiting. Waiting not necessarily knowing the outcome. Waiting when there is nothing at all left to do. Waiting with great expectation. Waiting, waiting, waiting. And then when God finally reveals what He's been working on, I forget about all the waiting because it was so incredibly worth it. And that's exactly how it works with a baby, too. 

Psalm 40 says, "I waited patiently for the Lord, he turned to me and heard my cry." David waited patiently knowing he would be heard and delivered. Isiah 66:9 quotes God asking us, "Do I bring to the moment of birth and not give delivery?" Literally I hear, "Hey Michelle, do you think God really blessed you with this child, brought you safely to full-term, and then is just gonna leave him in there? Come on." Or in other words, does God bring us through and then not show up? Of course not, He promised He would never leave or forsake us! And aren't we waiting as Christians every single day for another huge promise God has given us - the return of His Son. "Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near." (James 5:7-8) 

I'm trying to pick my crops before they are even ripe. I'm counting on my time, not the Lord's. But how humbling is something like waiting for a baby to remind you that you are not in charge, and if you can learn to wait patiently with a thankful heart instead of attempting to control and figure things out on your own, life will be a lot easier and God can do His job. So swallow your pride with me and praise Him WHILE you're WAITING.